This bit is on exercise

I always hated running. I hated exercising altogether and especially loathed the Physical Education classes I had throughout my education. I always had a running stitch, was generally considered not skilful in ball games, and had constant anxiety about hurting my fingers. I used all the possible excuses to avoid exercise, starting at age 6 when I continuously pretended that my shoelace got loose, and was super hurt when the teacher spotted my act and sealed my fate with a triple knot on both shoes.

I was relieved when I finally wasn’t forced to work out and could spend the majority of my time in practice rooms. My anxiety levels skyrocketed, but I thought that that was part of the business. I had pains all over, chronic back pain especially, but I told myself, no pain, no gain. My sleep was disturbed, but I helped myself with pills.

The thing which nobody told me - which probably would have made me reconsider my stubborn anti-exercise stance - is that good playing requires a strong and healthy body. And by working out, my playing and general experience would have gotten much better. I could have avoided the pain, reduced my anxiety, and would have eaten and slept better. It would have untied some of the mental and physical knots in my system, which later led to more serious issues.

After the onset of my dystonia, my first positive experience was yoga. I agreed when a friend dragged me to a class because it did not promise to be the sweaty, out-of-breath experience as I pictured ‘exercise’. I did get sweaty, but I loved it. Then, I spent a month in a place with beautiful mountains, where you just had to hike. I was astonished that I was out of breath after climbing a lump of earth which I would not even call a mountain. But the view was worth it. I pushed on. This was followed by a couple of sweet trainers in my local gym, who started working with me on the level I was on (probably -20, between a sloth and a snail).

Once the gyms closed due to Covid19, I wanted to do something. To get out, to exercise. And to my utter surprise, I found myself starting a ‘From couch to 5k’ program. Running. Me. Without external pressure. Unbelievable.

It took me about 3 months to run my first 10km. And I’m hooked. I feel better, breath better, sleep better, have a clearer mind, can focus more easily, and I’m more efficient.

Two main ideas here: one, I imagined that if it didn’t hurt, it didn’t do anything. Through the amazing coaching I received and this wonderful podcast, I learned to do a little, and a little more every day, and call it a success. I experienced how these small building blocks create something astonishing in such a short period of time. This I knew intellectually before, yet never lived it.

Second: exercise is good for you. It’s good for your mental clarity, your blood circulation, your resilience, and it calms your nervous system. Therefore, it is good for your MFD as well. You don’t have to run a marathon next week. Just walk around the block. Check out a yoga channel on YouTube. Move your body. Believe me, it’s worth the sweat.